It’s finally happened. A WWE show has taken place without One Minute of WRESTLING?!
This is the last episode of NXT to air on Syfy, and after tonight’s episode I can’t imagine any other cable station would want this show. Even the announcers said the show is awful. Wrestling booking 101 states that a wrestler should not say his opponent sucks. Because two things will happen: You beat someone who sucks. In that case, what does it matter? You beat a shitty wrestler. Good for you. But the fans will not feel the wrestler is deserving of higher profile matches after beating a no body. Option two, the bad wrestler beats you. In this case, why would the fans want to watch a wrestler that sucks, and someone he beat (which, logically, must mean he sucks more). If the announcers are saying this is a terrible show, then why the fuck would I want to watch?
Speaking of the announcers, this would be different if it was done in a heel manner like last week’s hysterical work from CM Punk. But no, that’s not what’s happening in this situation.
The Rookie Divas must compete in a wheelbarrow challenge. Hornswoggle sits in the ‘barrow. He also bites Maxine’s ass. We all wish for the days of a return to TV-14 WWE. (Speaking of Maxine, what is up with her photo shoots with Melina? Are they sisters? Friends? Check those pictures out HERE and some more HERE.)
Matt Striker calls Hornswoggle “the Great Gazoo”. This is the funniest line of the night.
Kaitlyn wins this competition. The fans lose.
WWE Classics on Demand shows a great night of wrestling from 1997 featuring Mick Foley as Cactus Jack, Triple H, and Stone Cold. Almost as if the WWE is saying, “hey, remember when wrestling was good?” Yes, I do, but stay tuned for more NXT.
Video packages air on Kaitlyn and AJ. AJ now rises to favorite NXT Diva. Not only is she a geek, complete with her “I ❤ Nerds” shirt, but she’s also a true wrestling fan. She knows that a 3 Way Dance is a wrestling match and not “what happened after my drink started to taste funny”.
Next up is the “Dis the Divas” competition. 4 of the Divas can, and should be ignored on the mic. AJ stands out for saying, “Divas can like video games and comic books”. SOLD! How many times can I vote for AJ?
Maxine could be a great sexy bitch heel, if she gets away from her attempted catch phrase. “I always end up on top.” We get it Maxine, you’re a big fan of going cowgirl, reverse or otherwise. But don’t worry about getting this line out every time. Just go out there and be what most of the WWE Universe fears: a woman in a position of power.
AJ wins the challenge.
Vickie Guerrero and Kaitlyn finally have a cat/cougar fight. This is the dramatic storyline that WWE hopes will lead its few NXT viewers over to WWE.com